My Life is under construction

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The attempt to silence a man is 
the greatest honor you can bestow on him. 
It means that you recognize 
his superiority to yourself.

óJoseph Sobran

10-31-98: all hallow's eve...

HAPPY HALLOWEEN FOLKS. october has been real. I actually wanted to post something happy here the other day, but the past two days have been mucho stressed. argh argh. I GRADUATED. i was gonna scan the letter and put it up but the car thing (yes i had to put it in the shop again...yes i just got it back two weeks ago, yes it cost me another $400). that depressed the shit out of me. I cried at work which is something i've only done about 5 times in the 7 years that i've been employed. i couldn't help it. the crying didn't really offer any release or big cathartic moment. but i got out of it what i needed, i guess. hmmm, but yeah, so i'm officially official no longer a student at the university of north carolina at chapel hill. sometimes, i don't know what i'm going to do with myself now. josh hurt his foot on thursday, so he wasn't able to go to baltimore for the closing. i feel bad for him. feel better baby. i know he really didn't want to go, because we were going to try and go to new york for Gwen's last. which is the other thing that has upset me. i who am the webmaster for gwen's fanpage. won't be at her last show. i know i'm nothing super special in her life, but i really thought that i would be at her last performance. but no, because i am in my mystic karma failure world. this is where i am, still in the triangle with nothing to do on halloween but go to a gay bar and ogle all the men who won't sleep with me. i even have the place to myself so that someone could come back to my place for the nite. hahahahahahahahahaha. cameron wrote me. i'll link her next week. thanks so much for stopping by, i hope you do so again. there are 8 weeks left before 1999. where the fuck did this year go? oh, i'm in gypsy now. i'm doing the saturday matinee because one of our actors is going to a wedding. okay, whatever...some committment. but anyway it should be fun. i'm playing Rose's father, Mr. Goldstone, and Mr. Cigar. Should be interesting, i need to start memorizing lines and working on blocking. gotta work on the can some, it's the official newsmagazine of CASA check it out. i may think of something else to write later. breathe bitch breathe. i think this is my favorite mantra. a cappella central went to another a cappella jam this weekend. kit came down because she went to state and wanted to see the groups perform. she and i are co-producing the showcase in baltimore. it's happening...if we get groups. anyway the unc's the loreleis and thv performed. both are my love groups. i am huge fan of the loreleis and they love me back. i am an alum of thv (tar heel voices) so we tolerate each other. whatever...that's another story for a less bright day. both groups were shy atleast 4 they couldn't do a lot of their songs or go all out. i mean the loreleis had to sing "lorelei" their signature song, but not a song in the vein of la-ladyness. thv couldn't sing american tune, their sig song either. the grains were still tight, though baritone is getting out of hand. tonight is trent's last concert. he's the hot gayman (cause he aint a boy) in the group. he just got a job in greensboro and can't devote the time anymore. maybe that's why they have an extra bari...hmmm. ladies in red have a new cd. i'm not getting it. they are just bad. they didn't suck as much as they did last week. but still, not something that i want to hear repeatedly if you know what i mean. i got a free cd and tape. oops i guess i shouldn't have taken that cd last week. i have two now. anyone want one. ah me. ya'll have fun tonight.

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