My Life is under construction

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The attempt to silence a man is 
the greatest honor you can bestow on him. 
It means that you recognize 
his superiority to yourself.

óJoseph Sobran

11-04-98: huh?

i don't think that i should wait to the end of the work day to update my journal anymore. i've got a headache again and i'm not sure why. okay i know i don't slepp enough but should that cause the kind of headache that i have right now. maybe i need to take a little trip to the... anyway. i'm trying to be a more positive person again. we'll see how long this lasts. it was kinda shattered this morning. i walked out to my car and the door was propped open...already not a good sign, but i thought that i had left it open/hadn't shut it all the way last night. no, someone had decided to sleep in it again. fucking A i'm so sick of homeless people. well, not all homeless people...just the ones in my fucking neighborhood. is it a sin that i don't like locking my door. does that mean that someone else has the right to sleep in my car. tear out my ashtray, empty my bookbag and make a general mess of my car, because i don't like to look the doors. i am thinking about getting a new car. it's time. there is too much bad karma that even a name change isn't helping any. and yes, i'll try to start locking the doors all the time now. but that shit just pissed me off. but at least this time nothing was stolen. and i mean nothing was taken. though the person did throw my lighter down where the ashtray had been and so i can't get it out now. that freaking unbelieveable and i'm sure it costs $300 if i ask my mechanic to do it. probably have to take apart the whole car or something. pick up 6 rehearsal went well last nite. well except caren was overly bitchy because she was sick and get remember what note to play on the pitchpipe for any given song. i mean hell's bells, it's a really simple task that no one really asked you to do. you took it upon yourself if i recall correctly. but we did formations last nite to sing in and sand through four of our songs. AND WE CAN actually perform them for an audience. they weren't the best sounding pieces of music that i've ever heard...but you could tell that they were songs...and that's the key in a beginning a cappella group. something that the accs...never seemed to learn. and i think that we're going to look pretty spiffy in our outfits as well. okay i haven't had a cigarette in almost 24hours. touch me. listen to gwen's last show clips at joey's site. breathe bitch breathe. i think this is my favorite mantra. again thank you cameron please visit her page. we share a bond.

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